Nobody “Gets” It

A lovely mom I spoke with today inspired this blog. She said, “Nobody gets it. No-one understands what it’s like to have a child with feeding issues.”

And people judge.

This Mom is a great one. She has two children, both with a Pediatric Feeding Disorder (PFD). She is dedicated to helping her children with their feeding issues. She juggles school, medical appointments, feeding clinics, and therapy sessions. At home she conducts food play activities, cooks with her kids, involves them in choosing new foods, develops learning activities and social stories about food, and creates theme nights about new foods…I could go on. This Mom is doing everything right, yet her children continue to have severe feeding issues.

And people judge.

In my many years of practice, parents have repeatedly expressed to me their angst about family members, friends, grandparents, teachers, and even doctors that just don’t “get it” when...

Fear - “I dread mealtimes with my child.”

Guilt - “What did I do to my child to cause this?”

Frustration - “Sometimes I think I’m going to lose it.”

Loss - “This is not how I pictured parenthood.” 

Let’s talk about parental mental health and feeding disorders.

I have spent endless hours in my clients’ homes talking to parents about their children’s feeding issues. Naturally, I talk about about cups, self-feeding, textures, and mealtime strategies to encourage the development of healthy eating patterns. Yet in equal measure, I have spent hours at kitchen tables, on couches, and living room floors counselling parents about the incredibly emotional and painful side of having a child with a feeding disorder: the mental health part. The part that doesn’t get talked about much. The part that frequently brings exhausted parents to heaving sobs during our meetings.

I wear many hats in this...